Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Gas Cap

I went on a little trip to the grocery store today. Actually I only went to the store because I tried to connect to the Internet earlier and I was unable to do so. Big surprise my Netgear Wireless Router shit the bed. This router is completely terrible. I guess the only good thing is the router is free and gets replaced by Time Warner Cable. So needing eats and a new router I headed out this afternoon.

Half way to the store I realized that I could use some gas. I pulled into a station on Madison Avenue and proceeded to go through the motions of pumping gas. To my mother FUCKING shock I did not have a gas cap. I had the pump in my hand and was ready to unscrew the cap when I noticed that my cap was gone.

MY GAS CAP WAS GONE.

Now while this did take away the need for me to unscrew the cap, which was a bit convenient, it also meant that I now DO NOT HAVE A GAS CAP. Thinking about it not having a gas cap is more of an inconvenience than just being able to jam the pump in my car without unscrewing anything. So much for looking at the bright side of things.

Do I need to mention that a lot of random dumb annoying shit happens to me all the time?

SO now having a broken router and no gas cap I headed to the store and got my grocery shopping on. This was the least aggravating portion of my day. Picking out the food was easy and I think I got a few deals. After the Supermarket Sweep I headed across the street to the Time Warner Cable building. Still no gas cap at this point.

Exchanging the router was thankfully painless. I spent a few minutes waiting in line before getting to the counter. When I got to the counter it took a minute or two to give my information before a new router was brought out. Like I said the routers suck big time but they do replace them for free. The only real hassle is I have to go out of the way to pick up a new router.

Replacing my gas cap was also not a hassle really. Again I had to drive a bit out of the way to find a Jeep dealership but it was not that far away. I decided to go with a lock and key gas cap this time. Did I forget to mention that the reason, I think, for my gas cap not being around is gas siphoning. Someone drove down my block, or more likely walked, and siphoned gas out of several cars.

Is shit really going that bad right now?

After talking to Christine I found out that there were gas caps laying around in the park by our apartment the other day. Christine apparently had seen them and thought nothing of it. I wish I could have thought nothing of it. Twenty two dollars later I now am the proud owner of locking gas cap. Hopefully this will deter the gas thieves. I think it will unless the people responsible bring along a lock picking kit with them.

Anyway here is a list. Every single name on this list gets a huge fuck you for today.

Netgear
Gas Siphoners
The Government
Gas Companies
Car Companies
The Bailout

Happier post tomorrow unless I wake up and some other annoying shit happens. Maybe I will wake up and my leg will fall off. l mean literally fall right off my body as if I were a Ken doll or something. Think about that.

Leave me alone,

MORTEKAI

p.s. Evan Roberts is a douche.

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