Monday, November 20, 2006

Monday is the worst and should think about getting plastic surgery to change its stupid face... no one will recognize it ever again. I hate you Monday, so much.

We got Wii and my brother is happy. As you can see I am not. A friends birthday party on Saturday, a way better day than Monday, ended early Sunday. I think I may have slept for two hours total before I had to get up and take the mini me down to Gamestop, which sucks ass, to pick up the Nintendo Wii system. After getting myself up and together enough to drive we were on our way. The store is only around the corner so the drive was not so bad.

Once we got to Gamestop, hell on earth that it is, it was no smooth sailing. There were a bunch of people on line who lacked many social skills, the first being proper hygiene. Smelling like beer and cigarettes is better than smelling like armpits and assholes for the record. I felt like telling these mutants that but I did not want to interrupt the frenzy of gamer speak that was going on. I might have been bit by one of them. That would not be too bad but when someone whose blood is 75% Mountain Dew bites you bad news is around the corner. Mountain Dew is some radioactive stuff.

Finally after about forty-five minutes of holding my nose and trying to stay awake my brother and I got to the register. He handed in his ticket slip to get the system. The transaction was going smoothly until my brother asked what games he had reserved. He was told none. At this point he remembered that my mother, he is adopted, was with him when he went to reserve these games. He asked the video game guy to check under her name, which is Debra, and there was nothing. "Impossible!" said my little bro. He knew he at least had Zelda on pre-order. Since I myself also wanted to play Zelda we asked him to check again. He let out a huge eye roll when asked him to do this, his job. If this scene were in a movie it would consist of a close up of the employees eyes rolling and the sound of bowling balls thundering toward some pins. He was pissed. Again he found nothing under my mom's name. He told us there was a Debbie in the system but he could not check that name for us because it was different than the one we gave him.

For anyone who doesn't know Debbie is a nickname for Debra in the say way that Bill is a nickname for William or that Dick is the nickname for Richard. I tried to explain this to the fine Gamestop, seriously this place sucks, employee. He wasn't having any though as if I was trying to serve him some meatloaf. I looked at my little adopted brother and saw that he was sad and did not know what to do. So I reached over the counter and grabbed this geek by the shirt. I shook the shit out of him while yelling, "Do not make me kill you for some stupid VIDEOGAME!" My brother started flipping this guy off while everyone else in the store scrambled for cover. Boxes and shit were flying all over the place. I think I even saw one guy pee his pants. The geek caved and forked over the game and we strode out of the store victoriously. I think I heard "We are the Champions" by Queen playing as we left. It was awesome.

Yeah it was a scene man. Sucks that it didn't happen that way. What really happened was I stopped myself before I grabbed the guy. I realized if I did it I would get in trouble with Johnny Law. My brain decided that shaking the shit out of a geek was a bad idea. Also if I shook him I had no idea what other stuff may come flying off of him. So I gave the guy a final death glare and then said to my brother "We can get Zelda at another time." We turned around and left the shop feeling somewhat defeated. I was happy that he got his system but he did not have the game he wanted to play.

Luckily the Wii comes with Wii Sports which is simple and fun. Little bro had a good time and so did I because I beat him in all the sports except boxing. The day turned out well, if not a little exhausting. I only wish that I had gotten the better of the video game retard.

As it turned out though I didn't have to do anything to this fool. My mother went down to the store and destroyed that guy. Mamma B is real protective over her, adopted, son. I do not think that poor sucker will ever be the same. I mean it, that geek is over. When Debbie left the store she had a copy of Zelda, Belize that. Plus I did not have to get arrested or anything. Awesome.

Here is a picture of a character we created for use in Wii sports. I promise a better picture tomorrow.

Wii are the champions,

P.S. my brother is not adopted that part of the story is untrue.

P.P.S It is true that my mother will kill you if you mess with my brother. Mom's don't get arrested it is a law.


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